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How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Body

I’ve been contemplating getting rid of my smart phone. At least as an experiment. I want to find out: Was I really smarter before I had a phone that was and can I get back to that state?

I’m fascinated by how addictive it is, the feeling of a world of information in the palm of my hand, and how comforting it is to be able to look up anything at any moment. It seems like I’m learning a lot with all the research I do. And perhaps I am. But the volume of information is so vast that I often have difficulty retaining or recalling specifics and sources.

And I wonder, is this really what I want to be learning? Because it seems like what I’m learning is to be impatient, compulsive, overly passive, and easily distracted. Of course, that’s not everything I’ve learned, but it feels like a big part of what my smart phone has taught me.

So, anyway, I’m curious. Can I retrain myself to remember phone numbers and recipes and shopping lists? Can I spend more than twenty minutes a day reading actual books without getting distracted? Or writing actual books? Can I heal the physical damage to my eyes and nervous system? I think so. And I’ve got a strategy. I’m working my way back to cleaner electromagnetic fields and wired connections and doing things on ye olde ethernet. That part is easy, actually. The hard part is undoing the conditioning, the habits, the muscle memory, and the mindset.

Which reminds me of something that has come up recently. It's another mindset that I’m working on hacking my way out of, like veering off a well-traveled road to chop a new pathway through an overgrown forest, and it has to do with my response to something I perceive as being wrong. So I'm looking at those things, examining the underlying belief, and if I find it’s not helpful, finding ways to shift it.

For example, I hate watching toxic crap being sprayed into the air or injected into children and feeling helpless to do anything about it. My typical response to seeing it is to feel upset and think something like, “No! This is so wrong! People are being poisoned!”

I'm not denying that kind of thought and feeling has validity, because I definitely think it does, but is it the most helpful thing I could be putting energy into? Are those thoughts and feelings going to help my body recover from being poisoned? Are they going to help bring about an end to the poisoning of humanity?

But what good are “thoughts and prayers” going to do in a situation like what’s happening in the world today?

To answer that question for myself I had to go back in time.

For most of my life, I spent a significant amount of time being hurt or sick and feeling pretty helpless about it. I didn’t get off to a good start as a baby and then it got worse. There was a lot of unresolved trauma. As a result, my health was not robust and my body was susceptible to all kinds of illnesses which continued to plague me well into adulthood. It wasn’t until my mid-30s that I realized I could shift the energy on a mental level to help my body heal.

During that time, I was learning about healing at the level of the mind and it was starting to positively affect all kinds of things in my life, so I knew there was something to it. I came to understand that thoughts are creative in nature and that every thought we have creates form on some level, even if it’s just a thought form. The fact that everything we see in the world of form started as a thought became very real to me. I knew it was true and I knew that I wanted to use the power of my mind and my imagination for something positive instead of something negative.

Let’s be real, though, when you feel like crap, it’s hard to think positive thoughts about it, right? I know it was for me. I couldn’t just lie to myself and bypass the fact that I felt horrible. But what I could do was say something to myself like, “Wow, I feel really shitty. My body must be processing something. I wonder what I can do to support my body in healing this.” Thoughts like that felt a lot more loving, helpful, and truthful than the kind of fearful thoughts I used to have which were more along the lines of, “Oh no! I’m getting sick again! I can’t afford to miss work. What if I can’t pay rent?” Those thoughts never made me feel even remotely better. In fact, they just heaped more misery on top of misery. Luckily, I realized that and was able to work on shifting my thoughts.

I discovered that not only did it make me feel better, but it was the shift in mental realm that was required to permanently shift the energy in the physical realm. Because what I found was that even though I was eating well and taking supplements and exercising and all the things, my physical health didn’t really improve much at all until I changed the stories I was telling about my body.

Instead of telling myself and my body stories about how my body was wrong, broken, and sick, I started telling stories about how my body was amazing, how it was healing everything, and how everything it was doing was right. I told my body that I would support it and love it and trust it, and that it was becoming healthier all the time. And it worked. I was listening to my body more, I felt more empowered about my health, and my body and I shifted from a lifetime of chronic illness to a life of radiant wellness and ease.

Do you want to know why it worked so well?

It’s because it was the truth. Life experience and common sense has taught me that when we align with the truth, we align with the healing power of love and the perfection of creation. The fact of the matter is, our bodies truly are amazing and everything they do is correct. Our bodies have miraculous healing abilities and are always doing their best despite the unloving ways we treat them. It’s how they were created. When they are expressing symptoms of what we’ve been taught to think of as the wrongness of disease, it’s because they have something they need to clear out and they are doing it in the best way they can. If we support them in that process, they become healthier. If we try to suppress the process, the physical or energetic toxins that the body wants to release will be driven deeper into the tissues and will then need to express as something more serious down the road.

We all know this on some level. And yet, isn’t it interesting how many stories are playing out in our minds about how our body isn’t good enough or doesn’t have what it takes to heal? Why do we doubt that our bodies are perfect? And who do those thoughts belong to? Are they even ours? Did we just decide one day to create toxic narratives, shitty self esteem, and disgust for our bodies?

We all know intellectually that we’ve been programmed since birth by the media and institutions of a culture that thrives on selling us on the idea that we are broken, our bodies are disgusting and dirty, and the next wonder product can cure what ails us. We might even be aware enough to be angry about all the harmful messages we were bombarded with during the most vulnerable time of our lives, our childhood. And rightly so. Denying the feelings of grief and anger isn’t going to get us to a place of healing any faster, but neither is getting stuck at the point of describing the problem.

If we really want to change our health and the health of our world, we need to be willing to change ourselves and the place we need to start is our minds. That's because the mental level is the causal level. It's where the effects we see in the world of form originate. Weirdly, the mind is both the easiest and the hardest thing to change. If we tend to associate our identity with our thoughts, we can easily become stuck. But what if most of those thoughts and beliefs we've identified as aren’t even ours? Are we stubbornly holding on to limiting programs that are making life a lot harder than it needs to be because we bought into the idea that that’s just the way it is?

I would argue that we can’t really afford to mess around with this garbage any more. It’s time to take out the psychic trash and get busy healing our minds, our bodies, and the world, because we are living in a time of intensifying crises in the mental, spiritual, and physical realms. Shit’s getting crazy, the future of humanity is at stake, and the key to all of it is in our minds. The mind is the leverage point where the psychopathic controllers of the world exert the most influence, because they know how powerful it is. Therefore, it’s also a potent place for us to focus our efforts to create change for the better in the fastest and most sustainable way possible.

The way I figure it, since the universe is holographic, wouldn’t it make sense that if I could shift my thoughts to help my body heal, I should be able to affect other things, too? Even things that feel totally outside of my realm of influence? In my experience, it happens, and frequently.

So, I’ll be here praying and imagining miraculous healing for everyone. Even when I get pissed off or despair tries creeping in. I’ll remember to affirm that our bodies can heal anything and everything. In the midst of chaos I’ll remember to envision transmuting this mess into a better world for all. And as I’m taking the next right action step to make it happen, I’ll remember to be inspired by the perfection of nature that already exists within each one of us.

I invite you to join me.


The meditation we did for Cosmic Fire’s Download of the Month for December is Diamond Mind: Third Eye Activation. In it, I guide you through a lightwork process for clearing the mental body of old programs, strengthening the third eye chakra, resetting the nervous system, and rebalancing the hemispheres of the brain.

The guided meditation is enhanced by a beautiful soundscape by DK Brainard designed to help you access deep mental healing states.

You can get an awesome healing and support Cosmic Fire by buying your own copy of Diamond Mind at the link below. Thank you!


Tatiana Sakurai is a lightworker, teacher, and author of Lightworker Training: A Practical Guide to Healing with Energy + Consciousness. She facilitates sessions, classes, and circles for students, clients, and community members at Cosmic Fire, Lightworker Training, and her private practice at

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